Summer is sure as hell in full swing now, just in case you were wondering. If you had time to wonder. Which you don't. All that time needs to be allotted towards these summery pursuits of pure pleasure, chief among them being the World Naked Bike Ride, and then the partying up at Femme Top, and the getting down at Nuggets Night, getting tipsy at the Portland International Beerfest, learning just what's Good in the Hood, havin' yourself a good ol' fashioned Hoot, taking in some impossible nautical achievements, and so, so much more. Hit the links below and load your plate accordingly.
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Femme Top
As part of Portland Black Pride weekend, Femme Top is a party and safe space for Black femmes and their allies to celebrate the contributions of Black LGBTQ people, and get sweaty dancing about it. The show will see beloved host Chanticleer Tru (AKA Chanti Darling), sickening headliner and Portland femme rapper Maarquii, and a handful of WOC DJs. Proceeds will benefit Sankofa Collective Northwest, an organization that promotes the health and well-being of specifically Black queer people. JENNI MOORE
9 pm, Paris Theater, $12-15
2017 Risk/Reward Festival
At summertime performance fest Risk/Reward, emerging and established performers test out new material on…you! It’s a treat if you care about Portland’s art and theater communities. Many performance festivals are spendy and stuffy. With work from Linda Austin Dance and beloved drag queen Pepper Pepper, and pay-what-you can ticketing for all performances, this one is neither. MEGAN BURBANK
7:30 pm, Artists Repertory Theatre, $20
Nuggets Night 2017
Transplants from the Mile High City might be disappointed to learn that the Star Theater’s Nuggets Night is not dedicated to the Denver Nuggets. The two-night event brings together a dizzying number of Portland bands in celebration of obscure, majestic garage and psych gems from the heavy-lidded ’60s, and all for a great cause. Benefitting the Jeremy Wilson Foundation (headed by the former Dharma Bums vocalist to support musicians with healthcare costs), the mini-festival’s first night features a host of paisley-costumed bards bringing the jangle and groove. Its headliners include legendary Hollywood crew the Pandoras, along with Chicago garage OGs the Shadows of Night, who scored a Top 10 hit with their version of Them’s “Gloria” in 1965. The second night is just as stacked, with Portland’s the Pynnacles and the High Violets taking aim before headliners the Woggles bring it all back home.
7 pm, Star Theater, $25-75
John Prine
Tonight the legendary singer/songwriter John Prine arrives in Portland to serenade our city’s zoo animals (and probably some people, too). Prine is beloved for making simple, but magnificent folk songs, which revolve around his acoustic guitar and inimitable drawl. Though his early work gets a lot of attention—particularly songs like “Sam Stone” and “Angel from Montgomery” from his 1971 self-titled debut—2005’s Fair & Square is perhaps Prine’s best record. He recorded the Grammy-winning album after undergoing throat surgery for squamous cell cancer, which deepened his voice into a low, gravelly rumble. Last year Prine released For Better, or Worse, an outstanding collection of duets with country stars like Iris DeMent and Kacey Musgraves. This all-ages, outdoor concert is completely sold out, so if you’ve got tickets, expect the Oregon Zoo to be packed. CIARA DOLAN
7 pm, Oregon Zoo, $44.50-104.50, all ages
Ziggy Marley
Edgefield presents a Summer night with the 5-time Grammy Award-winning reggae artist and eldest son of Bob Marley, known for fronting his band the Melody Makers and recording the theme song for the children's cartoon series Arthur.
6:30 pm, Edgefield, $43, all ages
Adam Conover
The past Bridgetown Comedy Festival performer and host of the hit TruTV show Adam Ruins Everything, which aims to reveal the shocking hidden facts that lurk behind everyday goods and services, returns to Portland for a weekend of stand-up at Helium.
7:30 pm, 10 pm, Helium Comedy Club, $22
XRAY Records Showcase: Blesst Chest, Deathlist, WL, Secret Drum Band
Local record label and radio station XRay bring a slew of Portland's best acts north for a stacked label showcase at the Fixin' To.
9 pm, The Fixin' To, $7
Metalachi, Latter Day Skanks, Robots of the Ancient World
Need more cowbell? The "world's first and only" heavy-metal mariachi band Metalachi has your cowbell, your guitarrón, and your vihuela. The Mexican band got its start when "what began as an innocent night of snorting horse tranquilizers in a hotel room with seven members of the village jai alai team went on to produce the greatest metal band ever to live." SHELBY KING
9 pm, Dante's, $15
Portland International Beerfest 2017
Three days of swimming in over 200 rare and exotic beers and ciders, games (you can't drink this much beer and not play some darts, right?) pub grub from a wide variety of vendors, the Grande Beer Garden where full pints can be purchased for $3, something called a Bicycle Pie Joust (!) on Saturday at 3pm, free re-entry all weekend, and much more.
4 pm, North Park Blocks, $25-35
David Sedaris
David Sedaris returns to Portland with his inexhaustible supply of hilarious stories about subjects ranging from his crazy family to life abroad. This time he'll be discussing his latest book, Theft by Finding, a collection of the original diary entries that helped inform some of his best works.
6 pm, Powell's Books at Cedar Hills Crossing, free
Oleada, Yankee Gaucho
The Portland-based chicha band play a Peruvian-rooted blend of cumbia with elements of post-rock, dub reggae, jazz, and psychedelic rock thrown in for good measure.
9 pm, Mississippi Pizza Pub & Atlantis Lounge, $5
Tango Alpha Tango, Holiday Friends, The Lower 48
Tango Alpha Tango frontman Nathan Trueb's knack for capturing the grit of dirty desert blues is infectious and fun, full of clichéd rock 'n' roll lyrics about getting high and lusting after women, and comes teeming with an arsenal of back-porch riffs and driving rhythms. RYAN J. PRADO
9 pm, Mississippi Studios, $10-12
BAD! Michael Jackson & All Things Jackson
An all-night dance party dedicated to the King of Pop and all his super-talented siblings, including hits, b-sides, remixes and deep cuts from Michael, Janet, the Jacksons, the Jackson 5—if someone from Gary, Indiana with the last name of Jackson ever made something funky, you're probably gonna hear it.
9 pm, The Liquor Store, $3
Batman: The Movie
"I suppose you’re only familiar with the new Batman movies. Michelle Pfeiffer? Ha! The only true Catwoman is Julie Newmar, Lee Meriwether, or Eartha Kitt. And I didn’t need molded plastic to improve my physique. Pure. West."
7:30 pm, Hollywood Theatre, $7-9
Good in the Hood Multicultural Music, Arts & Food Festival
The annual Good in the Hood festival is one of the most diverse and fun music, arts, and food events in Portland—full stop! And while an ignorant threat has been made against the festival, the organizers realize that fear will never conquer love, and there is strength in numbers. So walk the walk and support this critically important three-day event that offers tons of hip-hop, gospel, and funk as well as delicious food, a parade, kid activities, and enough positive vibes to fill a weary planet. WM. STEVEN HUMPHREY
11 am, Lillis-Albina Park, free, all ages
Dolly Parton Hoot Night: Mama Coal, Gerle Haggard, Hey Loretta!, Jenny Sizzler, Kara Harris, Marilee Hord, Nikole Potulksy, The Cabin Project, Weezy Ford, Katie Rose & Matty Charles, Lenore
Dolly Parton is humanity’s crown jewel. Her voice is made from honey and bourbon. Her hair deserves statehood, ’cause it’s bigger than Texas. She is simply the best. A dozen Portland singers will gather Saturday at twilight for this year’s worshipping ritual—I mean, the 12th annual Dolly Parton Hoot Night. CIARA DOLAN
8 pm, Alberta Rose Theatre, $15
Michael Che
An evening of stand-up from the Saturday Night Live star known for co-hosting Weekend Update and from his acclaimed 2016 Netflix special, Michael Che Matters.
7 pm, Revolution Hall, $25
RomperCon
A new era is rising in the realm of pub crawl. BEHOLD: The RomperCon, a stylish parade that starts at Splash and romps its summery way through Downtown's finest drinking establishments.
5 pm, Splash, $20
World Naked Bike Ride
You get one shot every year to participate in the juggernaut that is the World Naked Bike Ride. If you’ve never done it, 2017’s the year. You’ll be fine if you follow four simple rules. (1) Don’t be creepy: This is about body positivity, and bicycle awareness, and saving the Earth. Creeps will be bounced. (2) Get only as bare as you’re comfortable with, but definitely strip down somewhat. See rule number 1—fully clothed riders are suspect. (3) Get ready for high fives. This route turns out hoards of spectators (many with cameras) every year. You can seek anonymity in the middle of the pack, but it’s more fun to extend your hand and let the propers roll in. (4) Have your clothes handy after it’s over. A naked solo ride home can get mighty lonely. DIRK VANDERHART
8 pm, Fernhill Park, free
The R&B Rewind Fest
The R&B Rewind Fest presents the The Dru Hill 20th Anniversary celebration, with performances from Sisqo, Nokio, Jazz & Tao, as well as special appearances by R&B legends Howard Hewett of Shalamar and Ms. Chante Moore.
9 pm, Crystal Ballroom, $25-40
Uhh Yeah Dude
A live episode of the long-running, much beloved comedy podcast starring Seth Romatelli and Jonathan Larroquette.
8 pm, Aladdin Theater, $25-27
Donnie Emerson, Kyle Craft, House of Angels
Secret Society presents the Portland debut of Donnie Emerson, the producer and singer/songwriter known for the underground pop and rock hits "Baby", "Don't Fight", "Give Me The Chance", and "My Heart," all taken from 1979's Dreamin' Wild, an album Donnie recorded as a teenager along with his brother Joe Emerson, which was recently reissued by Light in the Attic Records.
9 pm, The Secret Society, $10-13
Heroes and Villains/Walker Stalker Fan Fest
A new pop-culture extravaganza enters the game. After the Rose City Comic Con and Wizard World now comes the Heroes & Villains Fan Fest, which is bringing a completely separate convention with it at the same time, Walker Stalker. The former includes some of your favorite stars from superhero film and television, including Brandon Routh (Superman Returns), Stephen Amell (Arrow), Michael Rooker (Yondu from Guardians of the Galaxy), John Barrowman (Captain Jack Harkness, Torchwood), and more. The latter is all about The Walking Dead, with guests including... well, basically everyone you've ever liked who's ever been eaten or beaten to death.
10 am, Oregon Convention Center, $45-90
Wonderland: A Sketch Comedy Show
FINAL NIGHT! Jason Rouse, Ted Douglass and Lori Ferraro present a brand new configuration of old sketch comedy favorites in a showcase for twisted ridiculousness, featuring practiced purveyors of absurdity Ferraro, Katie Behrens, Stacey Hallal, Laura Sams, and Janet Scanlon.
8 pm, Siren Theater, $15
Wooden Indian Burial Ground, Y La Bamba, Tender Age, The Wild Body
A wide range of acts hold court on the Bunk Bar stage as part of a benefit for this year's Homie Fest, with Portland garage psych favorites Wooden Indian Burial Ground rounding out the evening and DJ Papi Fimbres spinning between sets.
8 pm, Bunk Bar, $7
Green Noise & Zero Wave Summer Party
Green Noise Records and Zero Wave host a summer party and sidewalk sale, with an array of discounted LPs, CDs, 7-inches, clothing, media, and music gear to browse, plus live music sets from Mr. Wrong, Fire Nuns, Mini Blinds, and No Aloha.
11 am, Green Noise Records, free, all ages
Pickwick, Cataldo, Gordi
For several years, Pickwick has felt like a band on the verge of a big breakthrough. The Seattle combo built considerable buzz in the early 2010s with a series of 7-inches that showcased their modern take on soul music, featuring a little bit of grit and a whole bunch of frontman Galen Disston’s killer voice. A self-released full-length followed in 2013, and now it’s time for LoveJoys, which finds Pickwick exploring a funkier, more polished sound without sacrificing its natural swagger. Could LoveJoys be the album that pushes Pickwick to the next level? It could, if they get the kind of break they deserve. Tonight at the Doug Fir, they’ll celebrate the new album with Seattle indie-pop act Cataldo, whose new album Keepers sounds like dance music for wallflowers wearing Death Cab for Cutie T-shirts. BEN SALMON
9 pm, Doug Fir, $15-18
Hecklevision: Con Air
Normally, Hecklevision presents a particularly pungent scrap of cinematic detritus to aim at with your phones, firing texted one-liners (and ASCII dicks) until all your ammo is spent. But how in the fuck do you heckle something as self-aware as Con Air? How do you even dream of winning a one-liner shootout against John Malkovich, Dave Chappelle, Steve Buscemi, and Colm Meaney? Will your thumbs be rent immobile as the virile presence of Nic Cage in his sweaty, mulleted, beefcake prime thunders through Simon West’s better-than-Michael brand of Bayhem? Or do you think you can manage a gag or two amid the gunfire? You better be extra sure you have the goods, or the bunny gets it. BOBBY ROBERTS
9 pm, Hollywood Theatre, $7-9
Portland Timbers vs. Seattle Sounders FC
Timely scoring outbursts from Timbers’ stars Fanendo Adi and Diego Valeri have sent the team’s confidence at home soaring in June, all while talent bubbling up from off the bench has showcased some serious depth. Both factors should provide Portland the edge they need heading into this afternoon’s crucial clash with their bitter rivals from Seattle, so you’ll definitely want to be on hand to soak up the atmosphere surrounding this latest installment of the league's marquee matchup. CHIPP TERWILLIGER
7:30pm pm, Providence Park, $52-250, all ages
Sunday Parkways North
It wouldn’t be summer in Portland without Sunday Parkways, and today North Portland becomes a biking and walking wonderland as 9.5 miles of street are closed to cars, meaning you and your family can bike, run, skate, or do whatever without fear of becoming roadkill. The loop hits many of North Portland’s loveliest parks, and there’ll be food, music, and much more along the way. NED LANNAMANN
11 am, North Portland, free, all ages
Abronia, BlackWater HolyLight
A free release party for the sonically adventurous, musically expansive local band Abronia, and its debut album, incorporating jazz, psych-rock, country, metal, and the super sounds of the '70s and '80s into their repertoire.
8 pm, Rontoms, free
Roger Waters: Us + Them
All the large-scale bombast and pageantry you've come to expect from Roger Waters, but with way more classic Pink Floyd songs, and way less Roger Waters solo stuff.
8 pm, Moda Center, $35-296, all ages
Shannon Entropy, Mood Beach, Sheers, The Wild War
Steeped in a wild mix of styles, Portland's Shannon Entropy extend beyond the parameters of so many other local pop-rock bands. RYAN J. PRADO
8 pm, Holocene, $7-8
Sara Watkins, Langhorne Slim
Sara Watkins is an American singer-songwriter and fiddler who co-founded the progressive bluegrass group Nickel Creek. Tonight she returns to the Aladdin stage for a co-headlined show with acclaimed folk-rock singer/songwriter Langhorne Slim.
8 pm, Aladdin Theater, $25-30
Ex Eye, 1939 Ensemble
An evening with the new experimental metal supergroup comprised of saxophonist Colin Stetson (Arcade Fire, Bon Iver), drummer Greg Fox (Guardian Alien, Z's, Liturgy), bassist Shahzad Ismaily (Ceramic Dog, Secret Chiefs 3), and guitarist Toby Summerfield (Crush Kill Destroy, Never Enough Hope).
9 pm, Mississippi Studios, $12-14
Milk Carton Boat Race
Before there was a Flügtäg, there was this Rose Festival classic, showcasing handmade, human-powered boats made out of recycled milk cartons and jugs.
11 am, Westmoreland Park, free, all ages
The Maltese Falcon
John Huston’s 1941 adaptation of Dashiell Hammett’s Sam Spade story is ground zero for American film noir. At the time, nobody knew that’s what it was—it was just a quick ’n’ dirty piece of B-movie business. But as time went on and an entire genre grew from its shadow, The Maltese Falcon was recognized not just as the progenitor of all your favorite hardboiled clichés, but still the best example of them. The twisting plot that only barely makes sense, the pack of highly entertaining degenerates seeking to best our flawed hero, the duplicitous moll at the center of it all—it says something that with almost 80 years of imitators in its wake, The Maltese Falcon still feels just as fresh and punchy as it did when it opened. BOBBY ROBERTS
1:15 pm, 7 pm, Laurelhurst Theater
Barnham Family Hotdog
Scott Rogers takes his award-winning webseries to the Shoe Box stage, celebrating summer in only the way his character Big Ed Barnham can.
7 pm, Shoe Box Theater, $15
Don't forget to check out our Things To Do calendar for even more things to do!