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To All the Single Women in Portland

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by Anonymous

I am sorry that I don't make 6 figures, am not over 6 feet tall, am not a hipster, or am full of myself. I am sorry for being the nice, sweet, flower bearing guy that you say you are looking for but don't actually want. So when you are done complaining about the lack of decent men in Portland, stop and look around. We are here, you just need to give us a chance.

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